In a world of spray tans and “healthy” glows, I present you with a few reasons why it’s perfect to be pale.
1. We never have to be color matched. Just grab the lightest shade of foundation or concealer and go. Then cry when you get home and realize that even the lightest shade isn’t light enough for your glow-in-the-dark skin.
photo by someecards
2. No skin cancer for us indoor lovers! Suck it, sun! I’ll just stay inside and watch Scandal (aka Fitz and The Eyebrows). Of course, when you are in the sun long enough to get the mail, you get skin cancer. Awesome.
Even this kid knows
3. We will live longer because lack of skin cancer (see #2). More time to dress in spandex and leopard print, go to casinos and booze cruises as an old lady? Yes, please.
4. All you leather faces will get wrinkles while we will look like porcelain. Great in theory. But then when a client asks to “friend” you on Facebook, sees your picture while on the phone with him, and asks if you’re Asian? Nope, just really pale, dude. Sigh…
I wish I was kidding
5. Asians want to have the lightest skin possible and Asians know best. Except they look awfully funny wearing those full body suit, ski-mask murderer outfits to the beach.
I totally picked this picture for Leo
6. Some of the most beautiful women in the world are pale. Think Nicole Kidman, Carey Mulligan, Cate Blanchett, Scarlett Johanssen, January Jones, Christina Hendricks, Gwen Stefani, Dita Von Teese, etc. Except the most popular celebrities are tan i.e. Kim Kardashian, Snooki. Damn it.
7. Automatic halloween costumes. If ever dressing up like Marie Antionette for Halloween, you don’t even need face makeup! Bouffant your hair, put on your ball gown, grab a piece of cake and you’re good to go!
So there you go with 7 reasons why being pale is awesome.
x Pale Girl Gillian